Purpose

My Purpose

Today I had my first counselling session and it went well all things considered. It's strange being analysed by someone, having them watch every move you make but she said she could tell that I was  a strong person and in the end I left feeling positive. I told her that everything happens for a reason, I don't know what that reason is just yet but that it will all work out the way its meant to and I have to believe this. Like my sister having breast cancer was to show me that its possible to beat it, she is my inspiration and one day I will be an inspiration to someone else because I will have beaten this, that's what its all for

Yes, I'm actually quoting Justin Bieber and I'm not even sorry... you see my boys they give me purpose, a reason to keep fighting and the lyrics to this song really strike a chord with me

Feeling like I'm breathing my last breath
Feeling like I'm walking my last steps
Look at all of these tears I've wept
Look at all the promises that I've kept

I put my heart into your hands
Here's my soul to keep
I let you in with all that I can
You're not hard to reach
And you bless me with the best gift
That I've ever known
You give me purpose
Yeah, you've given me purpose

Thinking my journey's come to an end
Sending out a farewell to my friends, forever peace
Ask you to forgive me for my sins, oh would you please?
I'm more than grateful for the time we spent, my spirit's at ease

I put my heart into your hands
Learn the lessons you teach
No matter what, wherever I am
You're not hard to reach
And you've given me the best gift
That I've ever known
You give me purpose everyday
You give me purpose in every way

Oh, you are my everything...
Oh, you are my everything...

I don't know if this is wrong
Because someone else is telling me that it's wrong
But I feel this so let me just like, try my best not to let this happen again
We weren't necessarily put in the best position to make the best decisions.

You can't be hard on yourself
For these were the cards that you were given so you have to understand
That's not who you are
You're trying to be the best you can be but that's all you can do
If you don't give it all you got, you're only cheating yourself
Give it all you got
But if it ends up happening, it ends up happening.

That's what it's....that's what's happening with me
It's like God I'm giving it all I got, sometimes
I'm weak and I'm gonna do it, and it's like I'm not giving myself grace
I'm just like understanding, that's just how it is.

I realise I should probably be a bit sorry for quoting Justin Bieber, and perhaps tomorrow morning I will be but right now his words make sense to me so I'm just going with it.